What a crazy weekend it’s been!
Friday at 4pm my dad called to say that my mom was being admitted into the hospital due to chest pain and an alarming EKG. She had triple bypass open heart surgery twelve years ago and changed her diet, sedentary lifestyle and habitual negative thinking patterns…for about a month after that. I wasn’t really surprised. I was scared for her, for my dad, for me. And, to be perfectly honest, I was a little angry. I’ve been ‘modeling’ and sharing about my healthy lifestyle choices to my folks (plenty of yoga, pranayama, meditation, eating organic fresh veggies, fruit, beans and grains 90% of the time, deliberately choosing thoughts that make me feel good, avoiding news or movies that scare or upset me, choosing to speak about the things that lift my spirits rather than complaining (most of the time), looking for the good and beauty in things, trying to keep my stress levels as low as possible…) and urging them to make some of these changes. I just couldn’t get my mom and dad to do what I wanted them to. Ggrrr! I don’t have children, but I imagine this is what a parent feels when they watch their kids make ‘stupid’ or dangerous choices after having told them the ‘right’ way to choose!!!
After talking with my dad, as I was shutting down my computer at the Cancer Support Community, where I work when I’m not teaching yoga, I recedived a call from the Yoga Schedule Manager at Naam Yoga who was calling to offer me a new weekend class. I was numb when I should have been thrilled. I had been affirming in my mind that I would manifest a weekend class at a good time, and accepted the 11:30am Saturday class time she offered. We also shifted my Monday and Friday morning class times to start a little earlier, 7am, so folks who had to get to work by 9am could attend. I was in such a daze that after I hung up, I couldn’t remember what time my new Saturday class was or when the time shift of my existing classes would begin!
I checked the Naam Yoga online schedule this morning, so now I know it all happens this week, starting tomorrow!
I didn’t have time (really the frame of mind) to celebrate that wonderful manifestation. I drove home, grabbed a coat and some leftovers from the fridge, and called my two sisters as I drove over the hill in rush hour traffic to get to the hospital in the valley from Santa Monica. I stayed off the freeways and was suprised that the traffic was not too bad. While on the road, I realized that the next morning I was teaching a private yoga session for a new client and subbing a class for my teacher, Tamal Dodge. I had been so excited about both, yet now didn’t know if I could/should keep my plans. I decided I should find another teacher to be on stand-by to cover me for Tamal’s class, in case I decided I couldn’t do it. I had no idea what the surgery schedule would be the next day. I called the studio owner to get some teacher suggestions. Called a few teachers. Noone was available. I took it as a sign that I should go on with my scheduled plans. Perhaps being within my yoga practice/teaching all morning would be the best thing for me, after all.
My mom was in emergency at Kaiser Permanente Woodlan Hills when I arrived. Six of us were huddled into her little screened off area. We were all a little scared. None of us trusted the Kaiser system for such an important surgery. My dad actually told my mom’s cardiologist that, and she put it in her records. My mom was mortified, along with terrified, now. I thought it was the smartest thing my folks have done in a long time! By expressing their concern and being their own advocate, my mom was guaranteed that the Cheif of Cardiac Surgery would perform her surgery. You always want the best working on you. I was releived. So my mom was going to be admitted and given her own room whenever one opened up. In the morning she’d be transferred via ambulance to the Kaiser Cardiology Cath Lab in Hollywood to have an angiogram. Noone had any idea when she’d go in for surgery, just that she’d be put into the queue with the other cardiac patients. If there was plaque in her arteries, they’d either do angioplasty or put in a stent, yet there was the possibility she’d need emergency bypass surgery or that they’d schedule bypass surgery after completing the angiogram.
All my mom wanted to do was to leave the hospital to attend her only grandchild’s 6th birthday party, which was that night. She said she didn’t want to sign the directive allowing the surgeons to perform a bypass if it was needed, and she wanted to have a DNR (do not resuscitate) directive. Are you kidding me? What was she thinking? She was completely making fear based decisions — she was really afraid of making it through another bypass surgery, it was incredibly hard on her the first time. Thank goodness we convinced her that she would have a bypass, if needed, and she would be resuscitated, if needed. We know she does not want to live on life support, and we would honor that wish.
These are not things one wants to be thinking about on a Friday evening on 11/11/11, which I thought was supposed to be a very auspicious day.
Left the hospital at 11pm Friday night. Woke up at 5am Saturday, picked up my aunt and was at the hospital at 6:15am. Hung out with my mom and dad until 7am when the ambulance drove her to the hospital. I drove to my Private clients home and sat in meditation and prayer in the car for about a half hour. My inner guide told me that my mom was lucky. I felt an odd sense of comfort and peace, as if the god within me was telling me she would be OK. I dedicated the private to my mom and shared my intention to cultivate healthy choices and deep connection to our true selves to all people. We had a beautiful first session, and that client has booked me for more. I drove to The Yoga Collective to sub Tamals class. My mom was still in waiting, no news yet of when she’d go in for surgery. The room was packed. I sat in meditation for five minutes and then began to teach. Again, I shared with the students that I was dedicating the practice to my mom and invited them to help me send her and the surgical team light, love, healing and a powerful connection to the spirit within. What a powerful experience. I felt no resistance, like Spirit was flowing through me directly and freely! It was as though the 40 or so students and I were completely connected and in sync energetically. We were one, we were same, and it was beautiful.
I checked my phone after class and learned that my mom was going into surgery just then. All felt right. I knew my class and I had cultivated really high frequency, healing, loving, appreciative energy vibrations and that she received them. We had one or two hours until we would hear anything. I went home, changed, and left for the Hollywood hospital. When I was almost there, my dad called to say that the angiogram was over and had revealed that my mom’s arteries were completely clear! She was in recovery, had to lie still for 5 hours, would be transported back to the hospital in Woodland Hills then, and would be released the next morning.
During her recovery Saturday night, we had some amazing conversations about what a manifestation/miracle this was. She says miracle, I say manifestion! Call it what you will, it’s fabulous! Proof to me of the power of the mind, the power of meditation, the power of yoga (uniting with god), the power of law of attraction, the power of affirmations, the power of love, the power of family and community, the power of pranayama to stay calm during a great challenge. I am grateful for my yoga practice. It truly helped me get through these past 48 hours in a way I feel really good about. And I can’t wait to practice myself right now…to sweat, breathe deeply, to clear my mind, to fill up with appreciation and to deeply connect to my true self.
Join me this week for Affirmation Flow™, a power yoga style vinyasa flow practice infused with positive affirmations. Check out my schedule here on this site. See you on the mat!